Bye bye recess wk….hello to sch once again…

Din manage to do much studying during the week….

Mon went to out wif my dad n sis to meet his American Express banker, coz standard chartered bought over the banking part of American express, so there’s gonna be some restructuring which might affect the investment funds...but main thing was the jap lunch…haas…then went to hotel royal to do accounting II project…took ages to find the ulu hotel…which looked quite cui…duty manager too busy to entertain us…so no choice had to go back to novena bk to discuss…but it was rather fruitful discussion I felt…but still long long way to go…not even one-third done…

Tue was training…finally went cycling on tue…went to watch my parents perform qigong at the cc…but as a result of tt performance, din manage to eat mooncake n play lantern at home like we always did in the past…no fun!!

Wed was training…first time since so long that it surprisingly didn’t hurt n I could pull water…nice.…after training had to chiong back to sch for investment seminar…thanks to my nice dad who fetched me =)

Thu went to Shangri-la for buffet lunch wif my dad!! Yummy yummy sushi!! Loads of nice food but couldn’t eat much…and its super duper expensive, total for 2 adults was like abt 100 bucks…daylight robbery…wouldn’t haf gone if not for the vouchers…

Fri was the sucky tax quiz…after tt was supposed to go for naf bbq at east coast…no mood to go…somemore so far, go there haf to entertain pple….so decided not to go…hees…budden todae receive an email frm naf director regarding attendance…oops…realized I haven been to a single naf meeting yet (tink I missed like 4 meeting le)…since it always clashes wif training…shucks, means I must go for cac nite this wed…no more excuses le…

Sat was rather sucky coz it hurt again for no reason…sianz… anyways was rather irritated at the first part of the training…coz when doing canoe twist…suppose to be 10min non-stop...then when juz started onli, haven even 2 mins up, then the junior keep on stopping, do a bit onli then stop again repeatedly…peng!...maybe its still early ba…last time when we juz started, 2 mins also seem like forever…anyways, after training had steamboat lunch cum dinner wif the team…the table beside us was damn scary…they ate all super duper lots of crabs…the steamboat was overflooded wif crabs sticking out of the crowded pot…sccarryy…

Today my sis was super enthu on detox…so we had 3 different types of fruit juices today: orange carrot, green apple plus celery, watermelon and apple….and also vegetable and tomato salad…yummy…I tink I’ll love detox diet…but too bad, back to hall le…

Flunked terribly for tax quiz…sighs….cannot even pass…onli got 8 out of 20 correct…there goes 10% of tax grades….

No doubt I wasn’t realli prepared for tax quiz…there were still many stuff tt I din noe existed, onli to realize when the tutor went thru the quiz afterwards…budden the format of tax quiz seriously suxs…it was in the form of true and false, but there were 2 statements….so it was like
(1) statement A is true
(2) statement B is true
(3) Both statements A & B are true
(4) Both statements A & B are false

Sooo…even if I got statement A correct but got statement B wrong, then the whole qn wrong…Zzzzzzzz…..wad’s the prob man…a simple true and false format would be ok, why complicate matters….sianz….

Napha test todae...

Time flies…its been a yr since the last napha test, though it seems not too long ago…still struggling to accept the fact that I’m a senior already…oh wells….back then, we were ultimate worried abt the 14min timing for 2.4km (had onli clocked once below 14min…when I ran 4km every nite during 1st 3 mths of jc…was not crazy, back then was contemplating if I should join nj canoeing, haas, but stopped by that fear or hatred to canoe for causing that that will stay wif me for life)

Anyways, I still remember that last yr, it was seng kiet, my hall 2 camp fren, that ran wif me 2 nights b4 the actual test, to clock barely under 14min that gave me a lil assurance b4 the actual run…

But this time round, didn’t haf any assurance…my last timed 2.4km was last yr napha test...even wif 1 yr of training…somehow I feel less fit, less stamina than b4…

Fortunately, I did survive…it was a rather comfortable run…sighs, goes to show once again din not go all out…

started off with an ok pace, din chiong off straight away(usually I like to chiong the first few rounds…& tink abt the remaining rounds later…)…

felt quite high after the 3rd round…wanted to chiong a bit…budden decided to watch my pace, conserving some energy…BUT conserving energy failed…should not haf conserved…chuied at the 5th round…

din realli look at the timing…but tink its abt 12.20mins….1min improvement frm last yr…but dun realli haf that shiok feeling that I can say I haf done my best….I could haf pushed more…stop conserving…juz go all out now, and leave the rest to internal strength…

disappointed…nv doing anything right…

am not someone tt pple can rely on for encouragement, consoling, comforting, etc…somehow, I realli dunnoe how to encourage others, wad to say to comfort others, wad to reply when pple complain…sighs…always saying the wrong things...

randomness…somehow I’m always stuck inbetween conversations gg on ard me…yet not part of any…of awkwardness, of no mood to attempt to be part of it, of sometimes juz wanting to get away frm it….

Messy messiness...Scared for tax quiz…No idea wads gg on for other sources of income…always doze off during draggy tax tut…Haven started accounting II & investment project…accounting quiz coming up…scared for excel quiz…322 notes a mess…gotta start on 322 case soon…nv do company law tuts…company law report coming soon…been slacking on 212…always zzz during genes r us....no motivation to even do tuts…super lagging for all subjects…come recess wk pls…

Suxs....It is hurting again. It is always hindering me. Why can’t it be a lil stronger, I’m not asking much of it, juz stop giving me problems, had enuf of it…Hate it…pls stop it!

Never realli liked short distance races…

Rather off today…strokes wasn’t realli there...there’s major problem in my technique, esp during races, rock too much, motion not smooth, same old punching arm prob, recover too slow, not effectively pulling water, more like zamming the water…shit…

some talked abt giving all out…somehow, I haven’t felt that inner strength...somehow, yes I feel guilty of having some reserve...why why why…all tok but no action….yyyyyyy….can my arms & body pls listen to my head…

Juz a quick update b4 I hit the bed…There’s so much to say that I muz say b4 I slp & wake up for tmr’s race…

Today was my first time racing so many times in 1 day!! =) Usually I onli get to race once or at most twice for each race day, coz yar, I’m like the freaking lousiest left rower.

First race of the day: Women’s 12-crew Heats
This race was particularly significant to our boat. I was pretty worried for this, & I guess the rest of the boat were too. So damn worried that how if we couldn’t even make it thru the heats, we can juz go jump into the reservoir then. Sooooooo nervous that hands start numbing, right after the starts, first the pulling arm, then the punching arm, so afraid that I’ll lose grip of the paddle, body stiffens, but die die muz row damn hard for this race. Fortunately we made it to semis! =) Phew, it was realli such a great relief!!

Second race: Mixed Heats
I pretty much like rowing mixed (if I manage to keep up wif the pace that is). Mixed races are one of the few times during races that I can really feel that I stretching forwards, focus on executing technique properly, feel the boat gliding, feel that I’m pulling water.

Third race: Women’s 12-crew Semi-Finals
Pretty worried as we set out for the race, not sure how we’ll do, juz hoping we won’t end up last. Starts was not that fantastic, but rather ok, then came maintenance, huiqi called for hard 10 & could really feel that hard 10 =). Stroke rate starts building up, liked the pace, felt the pulling water, felt the boat gliding a bit, then came the best part, for once I liked our charging!! =) But still, we din come in the top few. No doubt it’s the process that’s impt but u can’t deny that the results are impt, or at least meant smth too. Quite sad thinking that it ended juz liddat…UNTIL, it was announced that we got into plate finals!! Like WOW! It’s nothing spectacular for many others, but it really meant smth for me at least. I felt it was like a breakthrough for our batch’s small boat.

Fourth race: Women’s 12-crew Plate Finals
Pretty worried once again, hoping we’ll not fare too badly. Starts was super gd, like for once our starts got a bit of power feeling! =) Liked the pace, a bit faster than previous set, keeping the boat gliding. Thought we had a chance…ok, that was like being veri veri ambitious…couldn’t maintain, we kinda punctured mid-way…wasted wasted…Haiz, I was at fault too, recovered slower than the person in front of me, & so the boat was not really in sync…soorryy…

Fifth & last race of the day: Mixed Finals
This is the few exceptions when rowing mixed was miserable. Was juz trying to keep up wif the pace, didn’t really manage pointer 3, my strokes were a mess, argghhh…sorry, I was more of a burden on the boat….sorry, I noe that was such a gd chance for a medal…process is impt, but a medal would be nice…

Tmr’s race is 200m. 200m would be more difficult than 500m, realli need charging & power…rather worried abt how our batch’s small boat will do. Prays we’ll make it thru the heats at least…

Better go Zzzz le…bus at 7am tmr!!

Naat is pretty interesting…Though nothing much to do yet, juz the beginning stages…Still it was rather fun today….I wanna be an auditor in 2 yrs time…But the bad memories of my screwed up attachment still haunts me…sighs…I wonder if I’ll be able to survive the working world…

On a lighter note, this sun is my grandma’s birthdae =) And my elder sis is coming wif her boyfren!! Woooo! I wonder how he’s like…

Maths quiz is over!!! SOoooo relieved… Stared blankly at the qn paper for a few minutes…Din realli answer the qn properly, dunno wad was I thinking at that point in time…Supposed to explain how to get the solution…BUT I blurly thought the qn wanted me to inteprete the final ans…ok, tt was a stupid interpretation of the qn…sighs…1 qn wrong out of a 2 qns quiz…

Been having this urge for night runs…argghh…Onli had 1 nite run wif sarah since this sem started…Nowadays so diff to find pple for nite run...So many pple gt leg injuries…out of our batch, can onli ask soo shuen, tay chuan, sarah n candice…pple take cares…

Super no mood nor motivation to study now…dread fridays coz of 322…sighs, time to start reading the loonnggg case for tmr…

I wan a new reebok running shoe!!! Hoping for my dad to buy me one soon….

No chance to slp at home this wkend :( Missing tiga doggie, missing family warmth & comfort...loneliness of hall life....

Starting to get excited about sava, the race feeling is starting to set in, reading the pre-race emails on yahoo groups…It’s been 1 yr in db, first race as seniors, expectations expectations ar, a test for our batch….lil fearful of how we’ll do…argh, dun tink too much, juz row a simple set, juz like training….pls pls left shoulder pls dun let me down…

Getting freaking worried for maths quiz on thurs. The thought of maths quiz has been haunting me day in day out, I sooo dun understand the matrix stuff, coz I wasn’t really listening during lessons plus din do last few tutorials, super unprepared for it, sighs, last min again…pls let me survive maths quiz…pls pls I realli wanna be a better student this sem…

Off to maths again, shall sleep soon…Tmr I promise to keep awake during lessons…pls let tmr be an exception, let tmr be a better one…

Its been quite long since I last updated. Life’s been very messy lately. Time is passing by toooooo fast, and yet I’ve not been making full use of it. Sighs…

Last week was one of a big mess. Rushing 2 presentations till late plus the many db activities gg on plus the falling asleep in almost all of my lessons (which I only blame myself for the lack of motivation, drive & interest towards my studies). Sighs… I realize that I spend onli 1-2hrs maximum per subject per week, and most of the time, I spend even less than 1hr on certain subjects (especially my accounting subjects). The cause of all the mess now to add on to the quizzes, projects & presentations that are starting to stream in. On a lighter note though, recess week is nearing in a few days time. Feeling relieved to finally be able to sort out the messiness, yet not at all relieved to know that 6 wks down the road are the exams once again. Sighs…

Yet, there have been many little things that make me smile along the way: going home on weekends :), going out for lunch wif my family, seeing my fat little tiga doggie, going for trainings, being wif my teammates, gg for nite runs which haf become rather rare these days, and the once in a blue moon being able to keep awake during lessons.

Sava’s coming up. A few seniors haf asked me if I was excited about it. To tell frankly, I dun feel excited, I dunno why I feel rather indifferent. Perhaps it’s the knowing that I may not get to row much, the feeling of being juz a reserve, the fear that we’ll probably not even make it thru the heats (like the small boat june race, those who weren’t in that boat will never understand how we feel, its just different. You all can juz tap water in the finals while we try to row hard during the heats, yet I guess the timing’s abt the same).